Archive for the ‘on writing’ Category

karma

How you treat me is your karma, how I react, is mine…

Oh, yes I own my thoughts, my choices, you yours, but do we only speak and act but once? No. It echoes down the highways and paths of time, embracing those who would listen, nipping at the conscience of those who would not. That pre-supposes there is conscience, that we are not just sentient, but feeling, compassionate. When I treat you, I treat with myself as well — it does catch up, bite the ass that commits. Your choice and mine, whether it leaves behind a playful love-bite, or something scarred and ugly and permanent. If I am to extend an act of kindness, should it not reflect in the light that brightens your eyes? And the crows feet that line my eyes will cackle and crackle when I receive your kindnesses, yet we are separated by the very karma that defines each of us, leaving us breathless but still anxious to own. Choose another path and commit harm, in words or actions; go ahead… whisper those nasty innuendos, or shove someone aside, or use your pen like the proverbial sword. The slices are deep, they attract infection and never really heal. We own those too.

If you investigate Wicca beliefs, you will find one of the statements goes something like this: ‘Once done, thrice returned’. This, along with being a marvelous credo for living one’s live, is also a form of karma, don’t you think…. more like instant karma? And isn’t that a phrase I seem to remember from the way-back days of flower power and love-ins. But it rings, doesn’t it?

The statement above is a concept sadly lacking in today’s world of victims and perps. None of us seem willing to accept responsibility, much less consequence. We like to blame, it’s fashionable, the first knee-jerk response to all those unexpected, sometimes terrible events that happen. Whose fault is it? Not me. Not mine. Oh, boy, I’ve been harmed, now I can be a victim. Not to sound trite, but this common reaction diminishes the tragedy of those who truly are victims. It makes us forget about them, look the other way, and there are oh so many other ways to look in this world of information saturation. It robs us of our compassion, blinds us, deafens us to the point where we become those wooden automatons trying to sell us all matter of products to make our lives better, healthier, wealthier, more satisfying. But the truth is in the karma.

As writers, the caution is perhaps twice, or thrice, as above. Putting something nasty about another person into words can and often is — aside from being willfully harmful — permanent. And, it is no longer a case of the intimacy of a private letter, but that which can and does broadcast itself worldwide. Think of the smear campaigns waged during elections. They rob you of compassion. They assume you cannot think for yourself. They take from you that ancient reminder ….’there, but for the grace of God, go I‘. The truth of these campaigns of mud-soaked words may have roots in accuracy, but the reality is the fuzziness left behind, like the aftertaste of a bitter drink which is definitely not medicinal. It’s cowardly, too, since the authors are hidden by anonymity, leaving no distinct individual to respond to. The subject is left to address the public in self-defense without the ability to confront those who would directly harm them.

Inflicting harm, whether it be in attack, or in response to such, is pernicious to both. Inflicting kindness or love, receiving, sending or in response, is compassion at its finest. And karma incurred, tabulated for later return is like calories. Your body counts them whether you do or not. Eventually it will show.

On Words

The Spark of Life

The Spark of Life

I find myself struggling daily to find words enough to scribe across the blank screen, a struggle, I’m positive I share with many. This whether it be for blogging, articles or the great novel screaming to find its way into the light from the cavernous depths of thought. (Wasn’t it Michelangelo Buonarroti who claimed that art already exists, it simply awaits the right strokes to free it?) Yet, there are those who seem positively and unendingly inspired, who simply sit at the keyboard and the instant fingers make contact, the words, sentences, profound and provocative ideas stream onto the page. Their strokes seem to have discovered with ease, the art of expression.

How does one find topics to write about? It’s not that each and every one of us isn’t creative, thoughtful, original. We are. I suspect it has more to do with inhibitions and self-consciousness than lack of ideas. You wake up in the morning, ideas, words, entire stories spilling out with each step, attending you like a faithful servant, anxiously waiting your next command, but suddenly vacating the premise, abandoning you to manage on your own just when you need help and support the most.

Frequently one sees the debate put forth that pen and paper are less an impediment to getting those words and thoughts into some sense of cohesiveness, than keyboard and virtual notepad. Yet I find, when the moment is hot and steamy, the keyboard is ever so much faster. Clumsy fingers, clogged pen and — where has my notebook gone? — the very idea of writing become a shoe trapped by a quagmire of mud, impeding the flow or words into sentences, into paragraphs, into — ‘my god, did I just write that exquisite sentence?’

But that’s just it isn’t it? The previous paragraph digresses from the topic, the struggle to write. I read yesterday something about finding your ‘ideal reader’. The analogy was used that when one writes letters or emails to a friend or loved one, the inhibitions fall away, the words, the expressions fly across the pages, sorting themselves into meaning, humour or the next quotable phrase. The idea is that whenever we write, we should do so for that perfect reader, the one who has been defined by age, by gender, interests, intelligence or colour of eyes. It probably works, I know it works, as proved to myself just this very morning. I’ve answered a dozen emails without thought, a quick glance to structure, eliminating those embarrassing spelling mistakes and typos and hurling them through the aethers at a single keystroke, confident in the knowledge that the recipients will not only read what I have written, but enjoy it and most probably reply. Yet here, when I must write something of importance, something of permanence, I find I pause. How do I express what I want to say? Will others understand, will they agree, will they continue to read to the end or throw the thing out in disgust or boredom and anger?

I could write about bees, and how we depend upon these tiny creatures for our survival. But then, I’m not a beekeeper, nor a scientist who would know all the facts. I could write about the all the people who have returned this past holiday weekend to their cottages, but what do I know about their lives, their loves, their health or income or conflicts. Which one hates his boss? Who amongst them is cheating on a spouse, awaiting a new child, struggling with a tooth ache, or planning his next assassination? Perhaps I should involve myself in some philosophy or another. How did the ancients view their world? Should we continue to pray even if we discover suddenly that God is dead? Or, perhaps I will deny all that I sense, for it is deception you see, it is the dream world that discovered the universe, prescribed its elements and invented the concept of humanity.

I’ve struggle over the words above, hesitating before the next phrase, deleting this, re-writing that, tinkering, doodling, making coffee, anything to avoid the commitment. Posting the final creation seems so permanent — oh dear, what if somebody, ideal reader or not, reads this and makes judgement? I think now, I shall put down my virtual pen, allow my thoughts to wander into worlds of fantasy, of fact, of tragedy and comedy, and await the next great spark of inspiration.

Bright Azure

In the silent cupboard of time
azure so perfectly bright
pulls out its brush
paints white, pastel, green, then fall

Essence stolen, squeezed out
renewed, matured, gone dry
such tales are told
‘neath the footfall of any who pass

of pilgrims and the faithful
who listen.

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